Overlooked

Ah, that feeling when a boss or parent overlooks my good work or achievements. That boiling urge to demand an answer, an account for why this singular individual, who from all appearances shares the same (or less) achievements. To watch as this person walks and flaunts the praise and recognition they have received through either promotion, award, cash, whatever.

Some of you know it well--that shadow who creeps across the spine and into our head when, yet again, a coworker or sibling receives accolades for something we already did (possibly better).

Older sibling syndrome? Perhaps. Cannot be too certain, however, as I have spoken with out of ordered peers who experienced the same.

When it occurs, my mind reels with the electric sting of nagging negativity. Imagination mutates into a grotesque play of marionettes twisting knives into my psyche.

"Don't like you!"

"You suck!"

Darkness swells until...

I pop?

Breathe deep?

Pray?

Listen to reason?

If I'm honest, I typically hit all of those. In that order too.

I wish it stopped there--but hey, humans being human creates love and hate. The wound deepens when perpetrators or recipients of "special" treatment make the accusation, "It's all in your head." Another form of victim shaming. It occurs frequently in all types of abuse: sexual, physical, mental, emotional.

Just remember: refrain from comparison. Someone will always have it worse,  doesn't mean we should use that as our "cure all."